What Is a Handfasting Ceremony?

Unity rituals bring an extra layer of symbolism and meaning to wedding ceremonies. While some couples decide to mix sand or share a drink, the handfasting ceremony is the most well-known and historically significant unity ritual.

Handfasting involves binding a couple’s hands with a cord or ribbon, symbolizing their union. Fun fact: this ancient practice is actually where the term “tying the knot” comes from. Although it’s often associated with Wiccan and pagan weddings, handfasting has become popular in various types of ceremonies, including secular weddings, vow renewals, and commitment ceremonies.

This guide will explore the history, symbolism, and process of performing a handfasting.

The History of Handfasting

Handfasting dates back to the British Isles, likely originating with the Celtic peoples around 7000 B.C. It initially marked a betrothal or a temporary marriage lasting a year and a day, allowing couples to decide if they wanted to commit permanently. Over time, it evolved into a key part of wedding ceremonies. Today, handfasting is appreciated for its historical roots and visual symbolism, especially in neopagan traditions like Wicca.

What Does Handfasting Mean?

Handfasting carries rich symbolism that reflects various aspects of a couple’s commitment and relationship. Here’s a closer look at the primary symbolic elements:

• Unity: The binding of hands signifies the merging of two separate lives into one unified existence. The cords or ribbons used in the ceremony often come in different colors and materials, representing the diverse backgrounds and personalities coming together. This physical act of tying the knot is a powerful visual representation of the couple’s decision to embark on a shared journey.
• Eternity: The loop or knot formed during the handfasting represents an unbroken circle, symbolizing eternity. Much like wedding rings, this circle signifies everlasting love and commitment. It’s a reminder that the bond created is meant to last a lifetime, reflecting the continuous, unending nature of true love.
• Sacrifice: The act of binding hands also symbolizes the sacrifices and compromises inherent in a committed relationship. It signifies the couple’s willingness to be bound to each other and to the responsibilities and challenges of marriage. This element highlights the understanding that love requires effort, compromise, and sometimes personal sacrifice for the relationship to thrive.

What Materials Does a Handfasting Require?

The act of binding hands also symbolizes the sacrifices and compromises inherent in a committed relationship. It signifies the couple’s willingness to be bound to each other and to the responsibilities and challenges of marriage. This element highlights the understanding that love requires effort, compromise, and sometimes personal sacrifice for the relationship to thrive.

1. Handfasting Ceremony Script

   A well-prepared script is essential for a meaningful handfasting ceremony. The officiant typically begins by introducing the ceremony and explaining its significance to the couple and the gathered guests. This introduction sets the tone and provides context for those who may be unfamiliar with the tradition.

   The script often includes a blessing or speech that elaborates on the themes of unity, love, and commitment, making the ceremony more personal and impactful. If you’re unsure what a script should look like, this sample handfasting ceremony script will be a helpful resource.

2. Handfasting Cord

   The cord, ribbon, or rope used to bind the couple’s hands is a crucial element of the ceremony. It should be something that is comfortable to hold and easy to untie afterward. Couples often choose materials that have personal significance or match the wedding’s aesthetic.

   Some popular options include natural garlands, shells, flowers, engagement rings, and family heirlooms. The cord should be over a yard long to allow for multiple wraps around the couple’s hands, symbolizing the strength and continuity of their bond. Ready-to-use options are also available for those who prefer to avoid the DIY route. We offer a pre-made handfasting cord in our online catalog.

3. Handfasting Certificate

   A handfasting certificate serves as a beautiful memento of the occasion and is typically presented to the couple by the officiant at the conclusion of the ceremony. This certificate, signed by the couple and the officiant, commemorates their commitment and can be cherished as a keepsake. Whether for a wedding, vow renewal, or another type of commitment ceremony, the certificate adds a formal touch and provides a lasting reminder of the special day.

How to Perform Handfasting

Once the materials are gathered, performing the handfasting ceremony involves several key steps. The couple stands facing each other and clasps hands, typically right hand to right hand and left hand to left hand. This positioning symbolizes the joining of all aspects of their lives, including their strengths, weaknesses, and individual traits. The officiant then wraps the cord in a figure-eight pattern around the couple’s clasped hands. This pattern, often repeated three, six, or nine times, represents infinity and unending commitment.

The number of wraps can vary based on personal preference or cultural significance. Each wrap of the cord can be accompanied by vows or statements of commitment, enhancing the emotional depth of the ceremony. For a dramatic effect, couples may choose to remain bound until the reception. However, for practical and safety reasons, it is usually recommended to untie the hands after the ceremony concludes.

Couples interested in adding a unique touch to the ceremony might ask the officiant to guide them in an infinity knot, ensuring that the knot remains intact when they remove their hands. For more info about how to tie a handfasting infinity knot, check out this video. Alternatively, it’s perfectly acceptable to simply remove the hands and undo the binding at the end of the ceremony.

Is Handfasting Legally Binding?

Handfasting, on its own, is a symbolic ritual and does not constitute a legal marriage. For a wedding to be legally recognized, specific legal elements must be included in the ceremony, such as the declaration of intent and the pronouncement by an ordained officiant. Many couples choose to incorporate handfasting into their legally binding wedding ceremony, adding a meaningful and symbolic layer to the proceedings.

To ensure the marriage is legally binding, the couple should include the required legal phrases and conduct the ceremony under the guidance of an ordained minister. This way, the handfasting becomes a special part of a legally recognized wedding. Of course, handfasting can also be incorporated into ceremonies liek vow renewals or anniversary celebrations (which don’t have any legal considerations).

Modern Handfasting Variations

Modern couples often personalize the handfasting ceremony to reflect their unique relationship and values. One contemporary twist involves having a family member in the audience, rather than the officiant, bind the couple’s hands. This can add a deeply personal element to the ceremony, symbolizing the family’s blessing and support.

Another modern adaptation includes involving children of the couple in the ceremony. Each child might tie a figure-eight knot with their own binding material, representing the unity of the entire family. This inclusion makes the ceremony more inclusive, highlighting the bonds that extend beyond the couple to their wider family.

Handfasting as a ULC Minister

Being ordained as part of a global interfaith organization, ULC ministers frequently officiate handfasting ceremonies and integrate this ancient ritual into a variety of wedding styles. As ordained ministers, ULC members are authorized to conduct legal weddings, including those that feature handfasting ceremonies. For those interested in becoming ordained to perform handfasting ceremonies, the process is straightforward and accessible – simply fill out the online ordination application to get started!